Too funny and probably true...

Hilary Clinton goes to a primary school in Ithaca, New York, to talk about the world. After her talk she offers question time. One little boy puts Up his hand, and the Senator asks him what his name is.

"Kenneth", replied the little boy.
"And what is your question, Kenneth?"

"I have three questions:
1. Whatever happened to your medical health care plan?
2. Why would you run for President after your husband shamed the office?
3. Whatever happened to all those things you took when you left the White House?"

Just then the bell rings for recess. Hilary Clinton informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess.

When they resume Hilary says "OK, where were we? Oh, that's right, question time. Who has a question?"
A different little boy puts his hand up. Hilary points him out & asks him what his name is.

"My name is Larry." "And what is your question, Larry?"
"I have 5 questions:
1. Whatever happened to your medical health care plan?
2. Why would you run for President after your husband shamed the office?
3. Whatever happened to all those things you took when you left the White House?"
4. Why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early?
5. What happened to Kenneth?"

Lifesavers!

A teacher was doing a study testing the senses of first graders, using a bowl of lifesavers.

The children began to say:

"Red..........................cherry,"

"Yellow.....................lemon,"

"Green.......................lime,"

"Orange.....................orange,"

Finally the teacher gave them all honey lifesavers.

After eating them, none of the children could identify the taste.

"Well," the teacher said, "I'll give you all a clue, it's what your mother may sometimes call your father."

One little girl looked up in horror, spit her lifesaver out and yelled:

"Oh My God!!!! They're assholes!"