The Moral Is...

I saw this one on the M&P Pistol Forums...

A 5th grade teacher was trying to teach her students about stories with morals.
Each student had to come to class with a story from their family that had a moral.

The teacher asked, “who wants to go first?” Little Jenny raised her hand and walked to the front of the class.

“Our family raises chickens for eggs. So I went out to the barn last year to collect eggs for market. I gathered all the eggs, and put them in a basket. While we were driving to market, the basket fell off my lap and a lot of the eggs broke.”

The teacher said, “very good Jenny; and what is the moral?”

Jenny said, “don’t put all your eggs in one basket.”

The teacher said, “who’s next?” Little Susie raised her hand and walked to the front of the class.

“Our family raises chickens for meat. So a few months ago we had 23 eggs. I thought we would soon have 23 baby chickens; but 4 of the eggs didn’t hatch. We only had 19 baby chickens.”

The teacher said, “very good Susie; and what is the moral?”

Susie said, “don’t count your chickens before they hatch.”

The teacher went through the whole class until only one kid hadn’t gone yet.

The teacher said, “I guess that leaves you Johnny.” Little Johnny walked to the front of the class.

“My uncle Bob was a fighter pilot in Vietnam. He was shot down over enemy territory. Before he left his plane he grabbed an M-16, a machete, and a bottle of Jack Daniels. As he was parachuting down, he got bored. So he drank the bottle of Jack Daniels.”

“When my uncle landed, he was in the middle of 100 enemy troops. He killed the first 60 with his M-16 until he ran out of bullets. He killed the next 30 with his machete until the blade broke. And he killed the last 10 with his bare hands.”

The teacher said, “Oh my gosh, Johnny! That’s a horrible story. What could possibly be the moral to that story?”

Johnny said, “Don’t Fuck with uncle Bob when he’s been drinking!”